Friday, January 6, 2012

Serial Dater

I did it!  I know I swore I never would, but I signed up for internet dating.... Here's how it happened; 

I was reading my love horoscope for 2012, thinking my love life was lacking so badly in 2011, it must get better this year.  It said "you will date several men this year, one of whom will not be right for you". OK, I thought, and where am I supposed to meet these men? And wait?! Only one is not right for me?  So I get to pick and choose?  Having just talked to my girlfriend, who is happily engaged to the man she met online, and who tells me one in four new relationships are now formed online, I got curious.  So I went on one of the sites to "spy". To my surprise, there are some quite handsome men on these sites, most of whom also seem to have both brains and personality. One in particular caught my attention, so I signed up just to be able to send him a message....hey, it was free, and he was really cute!


What happened next was a little unexpected.  24 hours later, not only the one I contacted, but another 46 men had sent me a message, including one inviting me to Vegas to get married by Elvis. Needless to say I had quite the boast in confidence :-) At least until I read the messages. One was 19 and "liked older women", one was 58 and although seemingly quite interesting - a little out of my dating range.  Most were shorter than me (and for the first few hours, they all were, since I entered 6'3" as my height, thinking it was the ideal height I was looking for...).  I finally saw where I could set restrictions on whom I wanted to be contacted by (and fixed my height!), and am amazed that I am still receiving messages after all the restrictions I put in (now we're getting somewhere).

Then I politely started answering messages.  But  I was really just interested in the guy I contacted, and I never intended to spend hours writing men I have no interest in meeting (and why did I sign up then, you ask...?), so I set some new standards. If their profile did not specify they expected an answer, or they asked for one in their message, if the message was a one liner, or their profile picture was without a shirt (I didn't even bother to read their profiles...) - no response.  Much quicker to just delete. For the rest, with exception of very few, I'm becoming a master in politely turning down requests to get to know me. 

When I was finally done, I checked my emails, just to find one from the dating site with tips on how to improve my profile so I would get a better response...


By now, I have obviously read a multitude of profiles. What I find most interesting, is how people describe themselves. What a tell-tale of how they feel about themselves, and what they think the opposite sex is looking for.  I checked out some women's profiles too, just to see what we say...and apparently we all "see the glass as half full", can take care of ourselves, and have our lives in order. Men love to point out they can cook, but I didn't see a single one who likes to clean and do laundry (that would be the ideal candidate!!), and they are all looking for drama-free women.  Hello!  I can be THE Drama-Queen, MRS. Bitch and so on, and 47 of them contacted me, like I will actually admit to that in my profile(?!).

Then there was the one comment I found odd.  This man was not interested in meeting a "serial-dater". Really?  He signed up for a dating site.  It is a little like a buffet....try a little of everything until you find what you really like.  If I can just find the time, I am most certainly going to be the new "serial dater" in town. Get ready Cupid, you'll be busy! Fulfilling my horoscope for the year, I intend to have the dating of "several men" out of the way in the beginning of the year (did I mention I am goal oriented?), starting with a home cooked meal tomorrow. Wish me luck!


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