Super Mom

The other night I watched 20/20's series about Homeless Teenagers.  If you haven't seen this, it is worth watching.  My heart breaks watching these four kids try to be adults, all while dealing with more baggage than anyone should ever have to. Be their own parent, raise themselves and take full responsibility for their lives.  I wish I could have 5 minutes in a room with each one of their parents just to unload and tell them what horrible people they are!! 

None of us are perfect parents. We all make mistakes, say things we know we shouldn't, do things that probably does not always gain our children, and I suspect, never have enough time for them. But we try.  My kids know there is no one who loves them more than I do. They know  I will keep them safe, fed and clothed. They know they have rules to follow and limits on what they are allowed to do and watch because some things are not for children. They know that I expect them to always do their best in school and in all their activities (no I am not Chinese, but  I do believe children need to be pushed to reach their full potential). They know that  I will listen to their input (read arguments), but that  I as their parent, have the final say, because I am the adult. So with all my faults, my children are still blossoming into wonderful preteens.  Question is, will we survive the teenage years?

I am pretty certain they will turn out OK.  There is nothing they could ever do, that would make me stop loving them.  Nor anything that would make me even consider putting them on a bus to nowhere.  What is wrong with people who expect young children to care for themselves?  I understand that teens can be difficult; that some get caught up in drugs and violence.  But if that happens, get help!  Kicking them out on the street cannot ever be the solution, can it?  I am not one who thinks it's OK to make excuses for kids' behaviour.  They need to learn responsibility, and that means accepting the consequences for their own actions.  I do however believe strongly that if a child is taught young what is right and wrong, along with respect for one self and others, and that it is OK to say no (just not to doing chores...) - it goes a long way.  But in my opinion, most important in a child's life, is knowing that she is loved, and that a parent's love is unconditional.

It is easy to make a child, but to bring up a secure, healthy and happy child is a lifelong job, and the toughest one we can get.  Luckily it is also the most rewarding!